RE: The Kafka-esque Universe

Then no it is not what a Christian means.
but here is a little story;

Omlor Univers-ity

First day of school.
Classroom. Clean bright and bare except for the desks in neat rows and a
antiseptic odor masking an aged musky smell. Walls bare windows shut except
the one adjacent to the teachers desk. Temperature very warm.

the students sit with pen and pad at the ready; uncomfortable from the
warmth with shirts and blouses partly unbuttoned and stretched open.

Professor: (standing, holds out a book in the palm of his up turned hand)
Students! Snatch this text from my hand.

the student in the front row makes a grab, misses and topples his desk over
with a loud uncomfortable clatter.
as the student recovers, a frown flickers across the professor's brow.

Professor: When you are able to then you will be ready to pass.

a student in the back raises his hand.

Professor: (with a bored frown) what!

back student: what text, what hand?

Professor: (very annoyed) you are in the wrong class, the intermediate
class is two doors down to your left.

the student leaves.

Another hand is lifted by another student near the middle.

Professor: (even more annoyed) WHAT!

middle student: What is a text? What is a hand?

Professor: You too are in the wrong class, the advanced class is in the
next building over.

the student leaves.

while the professor was sending the errant students off the student in the
front row who had fallen in his grab for the book had taken it and was
reading.

The professor noticing his empty hand quickly raises his head looking for
the text. He sees the student reading. His face flushes red, pupils
dilate, spittle gathers at the corners of his mouth as his breath becomes
louder.

Professor: WHAT do you think you are doing?

the front student continues to read.

Professor: I said, What do you think you are doing?

the student lifts his eyes and sees the professor standing over him. the
student closes the book.
the professor holds out his hand for the text.

front Student: Snatch this book from my hand.

the professor grabs for the text and the student does not move his hand and
the professor knocks the text to the floor, several torn pages float a few
feet away before settling on the floor.

Professor: Get out of MY classroom! Get out!

the student stands up to leave.

front student: what was that book? This isn't Physics is it?

Professor: NO! leave!

front student: Where is Physics?

Professor: This is an institution of higher learning not a mechanics shop
there is no Physics here.

Student: Oh,...

the professor clutches his chest and falls to his knees and slumps down.

the front student rolls him onto his back and administers CPR.

the paramedics arrive and cart the professor away.

Later that day, registrars office.

front student: yes, I want a refund.
               I need physics.
               what?
               No it wasn't.
               Well there must have been some confusion but the text in the
classroom had nothing to do with
               physics.
               Yes it was the Kafka Building, room OU 812, let me see that.
                   Well if that was physics then I definitely want a refund.
                   No I don't want to take another class here.
                   Just keep it, it seems you need it more than me.
               Is there a toilet I can use around here?

Daniel

if you mean:
literally to take john's place in the jaws of death
this very afternoon--
well--ah,
no.

(sorry, john.)

however, it might be an inducement to go to bed....

kim
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Received on Fri Aug 22 14:01:50 2003