advice to Camille

Scottie Bowman (rbowman@indigo.ie)
Wed, 18 Aug 1999 08:32:23 +0100 

    '... my conjecture here is that in *real* life Scottie is just
    a mild mannered unregarded man who wouldn't harm a fly ...'

    That's warm, Camille, but not quite right.  You should
    visualise someone more along the lines of Edmund Gwynn
    in the old Frank Capra movies.

    I've found that the persona of senile, bumbling good nature
    to be an extremely effective cover.  Once that was established
    I realised I could get away with almost anything.  The habit
    of suing the indigent for unpaid fees; that daily attendance
    at 'punishment call' in the local prison; my insistence on
    lying up *on* the couch beside my better looking women
    patients - all these are put down to my funny little, endearing
    ways as an elder statesman of the community.

    You're too young for all that but in light of your present
    environment may I suggest a façade of extreme Anglified primness
    & correctness?  This will discourage rival sisters, present a challenge
    to the rough trade from the outback & make you the obvious
    recipient for the confidences of strangers - a commodity so valuable,
    as we all know, for any writer.

    Scottie B.