where the ducks go
Mighty Mighty Aphrodite (jwu@brynmawr.edu)
Fri, 05 Dec 1997 23:10:29 -0500 (EST)
i've been away much too long from this list... its been a trying time on
campus lately, but i've survived that november crunch and am about to
embark on finals (and 500 pages of essay writing since i'm one of those
damn english majors that must be the bane of salinger's life, huh?).
everybody is a bit stressed out and acting very catty towards one another
(but i'm sure there's no connection there...), and i just keep saying to
myself "this, too, will pass".
but that doesn't have anything to do with this list. sorry. i just feel
like we know one another for so long now; i've read so many postings and
heard so much love, hate, disgust, loathing, and inspiration that i'm sure
if i would have been in seattle, colorado, memphis, nyc, or even
overseas, i'd know who you were.
but that doesn't have anything to do with this list, either, does it? i
know i haven't participated much on the list (only once actually), but i
thought i heard holden's voice in the volleying of emails.
> of other people's contributions. That's not what I signed up for and
> that's not anything I want to be a part of. I want to be part of a
> community where people can freely express their thoughts without fear
> that someone else is going to come along and ruin it.
it reminded me (again -- is this all i think about?) of holden and his
sister's playground and how he wished he could erase all the profanity
from the walls and make everything clean. but he was afraid, of course, of
someone coming along right behind him and rewriting it all over again.
it happens.
and i thought about salinger, too, sitting in cornish, new hampshire with
his doughnut holes. holden wanted to make everything "quiet" and pure, and
salinger wrote all this text -- text that people are arguing and arguing
about -- that isn't as quiet as that little man in rhtrb or as invisible,
either.
maybe salinger is human, afterall, and not that perfect man i thought he
was when i read citr in junior high. not contradictions, but intricacies?
the multi-faceted human being? hmm.
i'm not condoning nor condemning what people write (afterall, whats fourth
of july for anyways?), but i just wanted my voice heard here. i wanted to
hear holden, too. and i wanted to tell everyone about my new (and maybe
naive) discovery (epiphany?).
caffeinated and a bit sleep deprived,
jen
happy holidays