Re: Zooey

kkfchoi@netcom.ca
Fri, 25 Jul 1997 11:39:27 -0400 (EDT)

I never will learn to read English aloud: Jessica Davidson
I never will learn to read English aloud.
There's *mowed*, *towed* and *rowed*, but then there's *allowed*
And once I had finally learned to say *move*,
I met *love*, *shove* and *dove*, and what did it *prove*?
It *proves* that I'll never discover the *coves*
Where the treasure was found, nor the *stoves* nor the *groves*
What a merciless language, where *thread* rhymes with *bread*
But *plead* goes with *lead* (though the metal is *lead*)!
And *food* rhymes with *brood*, and also with *mood*,
But *stood* rhymes with *good*, and also with *hood*,
While nothing but *mud* rhymes with *flood* and with *blood*.
*Cut* goes with *cull* and *put* goes with *pull*
And then I come up with a *but* and a *bull*.
The dog had *gone* off and he's *done* with his *bone*.
As for me, can I travel to *town* on my *own*?
I'll *rush* over to *push* the poor child through the door
*But* I don't think I'll *put* up with this any more.
Wear a *boot* on your *foot*, push the *hoe* with your *shoe*
But wherever you *go*, don't do what I *do*.
You can say that you've *heard* that the prince grew a *beard*.
The *heir* to the throne? That's really quite *weird*.
There's *blew* and there's *blow*, there's *knew* and there's *know*
And as soon as I've learned it, there's *sew* and there's *sow*.
What a language where *manslaughter's* surely a crime
But *man's laughter*--same letters--will give you no rhyme!
"I have *paid* for the *plaid*." That  is just what he *said*!
I'll never *read* English as it should be *read*.

>Still rhymes with the way I'd pronounce Joey.
>Feeling very phonetically challenged suddenly,
>sonny
  That's my bet, but I think I'll drop this altogether.  Sorry the poem took so long.