Nuts
Malcolm Lawrence (malcolm@wolfenet.com)
Sat, 02 May 1998 02:06:10 -0700
A little weekend levity. Enjoy.
This one is for Tim, if he's still here.
Malcs
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There was a huge nut tree by the cemetery fence. One day two boys
filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight,
and began dividing the nuts. "One for you, one for me. One for you,
one for me," counted one boy. The bucket was so full, several rolled
out towards the fence.
Cycling down the road by the cemetery was a third boy. As he
passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He
slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one
for me. One for you." He knew what it was.
"Oh my Lord!" he shuddered, "It's Satan and St. Peter dividing the
souls at the cemetery!" He cycled down the road and found an old man
with a cane, hobbling along. "Come quick!" he said. "You won't
believe what I heard. Satan and St. Peter are down at the cemetery
dividing the souls."
The man said, "Shoo, you brat! Can't you see I'm finding it hard
to walk as it is!" After several pleas, the man hobbled to the
cemetery and heard "One for you, one for me. One for you, one..."
The old man whispered, "Boy, you's been tellin' the truth! Let's see
if we can see the Devil himself."
Shivering with fear, they edged toward the fence, still unable to
see anything, but they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you,
one for me. And one last one for you. That's all. Let's go get
those nuts by the fence, and we'll be done."
They say the old guy made it to town 10 minutes before the boy.