Subject: Re: Too quiet in here
From: Otto Sell (o.sell@telda.net)
Date: Tue Oct 31 2000 - 05:23:40 GMT
On jovial manners from the Pynchon-list:
To give a person one's opinion and correct his faults is an important thing.
It is compassionate and comes first in matters of service. But the way of
doing this is extremely difficult. To discover the good and bad points of a
person is an easy thing, and to give an opinion concerning them is easy,
too. For the most part, people think that they are being kind by saying the
things that others find distasteful or difficult to say. But if it is not
received well, they think that there is nothing more to be done. This is
completely worthless. It is the same as brining shame to a person by
slandering him. It is nothing more than getting it off one's chest.
To give a person an opinion one must first judge well whether that person is
of the disposition to receive it or not. One must become close with him and
make sure that he continually trusts one's word. Approaching subjects that
are dear to him, seek the best way to speak and to be well understood. Judge
the occasion, and determine whether it is better by letter or at the time of
leave-taking. Praise his good points and use every device to encourage him,
perhaps by talking about one's own faults without touching on his, but so
that they will occur to him. Have him receive this in the way that a man
would drink water when his throat is dry, and it will be an opinion that
will correct faults.
This is extremely difficult. If a person's fault is a habit of some years
prior, by and large it won't be remedied. I have had this experience myself.
To be intimate with all one's comrades, correcting each other's faults, and
being of one mind to be of use to the master is the great compassion of a
retainer. By bringing shame to a person, how could one expect to make him a
better man?
It is bad taste to yawn in front of people. When one unexpectedly has to
yawn, if he rubs his forehead in an upward direction , the sensation will
stop . If that does not work, he can lick his lips while keeping his mouth
closed, or simply hide it with his hand or his sleeve in such a way that no
one will know what he is doing. It is the same with sneezing. One will
appear foolish. There are other things besides these about which a person
should use care and training.
--from _Hagakure: The Way of the Samurai_
Otto :-)
http://www.itap.de/homes/otto/jds/jdsindex.htm
-------------------------
o.sell@telda.net
http://www.itap.de/homes/otto/index.html
(Golden Web Award 2000-2001)
http://www.itap.de/homes/otto/pynchon/episode.htm
----- Original Message -----
From: Scottie Bowman <rbowman@indigo.ie>
To: <bananafish@roughdraft.org>
Sent: Tuesday, October 31, 2000 8:01 AM
Subject: Re: Too quiet in here
>
> Hadn't you heard, D.? They've all gone out to
> the ball game.
>
> All those hearty chaps with the outdoor complexions
> & miniature heads & jovial manners.
>
> Scottie B.
>
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