Re: Re: Mr. Antolini
Brendan McKennedy (the.tourist@mailexcite.com)
Wed, 03 Dec 1997 06:43:59 -0700
Sayeth Patti:
.I think, like Holden, Antolini has been
>there, but has been forced to compromise himself in order to survive... I'm
>not repulsed by Antolini's gesture...maybe sympathetic and a little
>frightened at the desperateness of the gesture...and I think that it's that
>desperateness that freaks Holden out..
Yes yes yes...that's exactly what I was trying to articulate, and I couldn't quite
get it:
Antolini has been forced to compromise himself...
I think if Holden survives to become an adult, he will become Antolini. I honestly
think that Antolini a glimpse of Holden's future...
I also agree that Holden was terrified by Antolini's desparation, and that's what
scared him off. I think he must have all at once glimpsed himself, his own future,
and his own desparation in Antolini's gesture.
I also think that Holden has some feelings for Mr. Antolini--I mean, of course he
has feelings for him, but I think it stems beyond admiration to a sort of idealization--in
the same way that Holden has idealized childhood--and I think Antolini's desparation
shattered that idealization.
The reason I say that Holden has deeper feelings--and not necessarily homosexual,
or romantic, or whatever--is because Holden admired Mr. Antolini most for covering
up poor James Castle with his coat...and at another point earlier in the novel, Holden
says he'd jump out of a window if he thought someone would cover him up when he hit
the ground.
Maybe Holden is jealous of James Castle--for being brave, for being dead, and for
earning Mr. Antolini's protection...(I know I'm treading dangerous waters here.)
All of this is still very confusing to me, and after I was thinking that Mr. Antolini
is a portrayal of Holden twenty years later, I got to thinking that maybe old Spencer
is a portrayal of Holden sixty or so years later...
I know it's crazy, and I can't quite expound on my logic right now...since there's
no logic involved.
Just another thought.
Brendan
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