Re: wisdom again
jordie chambers (jordiekc@rocketmail.com)
Thu, 27 May 1999 14:44:23 -0700 (PDT)
Melville's Moby Dick uses an open analogy for the chase of
the unknown. Ahab chased the great whale until he died
and he was never happy. We're all trying to understan
what hasn't been understood yet. I think the urge to
chase arises from the depths of the unconscious wailing at
the inner child, wanting for innocence or death, causing
our selves to chase both. We all fell from the Garden of
Eden when we were younger, most of us want to go back
there and fewer are willing to forget what they've learned
in an attempt to get back there. I think it's that
longing for the simplicity and newness and unswerving
goodness of childhood that makes us so unhappy, that
longing for innocence and if that's unattainable, death.
Day to day life can smother anyone's spirit. We could
unwind the memory of living until we screamed for ice
cream again and were amazed by roller coasters, but
eventually, we'd repeat the same course of life and arrive
at the same drawing board. I've come back to the drawing
board dozens of times, and every time I forge a new
attitude I'll come back again, to the drawing board,
whimpering. I read so that I can form better solutions at
the drawing board, and I don't read self help books or
instructional manuals, I read fiction so that I can learn
from that distanced perspective of life. By reading
Steinbeck, Salinger, Sookel etc., I gather subjective
knowledge from people much older and experienced than me.
I'll take that to the drawing board and try the knowledge
out in real life, but it won't work for the purpose of
gathering happiness, it never does. I think simplicity is
key to finding happiness, saying to a little girl in a
banana swimsuit, "My, what a nice color of blue," or
calling the kettle black and being satisfied with it
unless I need to use it. If I need to use the kettle,
I'll use the knowledge that I've gathered which could be
turning on the stove, filling it with water, etc., or it
could be tasting the tea that I'll make with it before
it's made or picturing my lover's lips as she drinks from
the cup or feeling the warmth the hot kettle gives off. I
really don't like that analogy, but I'll leave it for lack
of a better way to explain my latest rubric at the drawing
board: keep it simple. I don't believe knowledge has
anything to do with the pursuit of happiness unless that
knowledge is used to create or add to happiness. I find
myself learning how to walk and talk all over again;
though I'm still bitter and depressed, at least it's new.
Btw, I only know of Vonnegut's version of Pearls Before
Swine from his novel, God Bless You Mr. Rosewater, though
I doubt that's the definition you were looking for.
There's a Zen parable about Pearls Before Swine also, but
I forget how it goes.
I'm currently
> entertaining the notion that knowledge/wisdom and
happiness are mutually
> exclusive. I entertain suicidal fantasies daily. I am
compelled to read &
> know more. Knowledge satisfies my thirst, but it does
not make me happy...
> Thor
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